Unfortunate movies.

Current mood: horrified

Wednesday, May 09, 2007

www.lionsgate.com/deltafarce

Let me just begin by saying that I feel uncomfortable even saying the name of this film and I hope you do as well.

I saw a preview for this film when I went to see Hot Fuzz. I came to the conclusion that this is what happens when republicans make a comedy.

Apparently 3 incompentant soldiers get accidentally dropped into Mexico instead of Iraq and hijinks ensue.

But not the good kind of hijinks that happens in 80's movies, such as people falling in swimming pools, sneaking hot girls into your bedroom after hours and pies getting accidentally hurled into old ladies faces. Perhaps a car chase or two and definitely Rodney Dangerfield making wisecracks.

While watching the preview, I started to think about were I an actor, at what point would I accept such a role. How much of myself and my values would I need to comprimise would in order to get a job. Unfortunately I have a sneaking suspicions that these actors weren't really making any moral comprimises when they signed the contract for this film:

It stars three people who I had never heard of (until the magic of Wikipedia) including the freakish DJ Qualls, (star of such film gems as Road Trip and The New Guy), Bill Engvalls (even IMDB didn't really have much to say about him) and Larry the Cable Guy. Fans of "Dorf" and Jeff Foxworthy, hold on to your hats!

I went to Larry the Cable Guy's website because I was curious to see if he was the flag waving "Fuck Bin Ladin" t-shirt wearing moron that his name and presence in Delta Farce might denote.

Turns out, he is. He actually says this on the front page:

"The preceding script was for entertainment purposes only. If you're uptight, humorless, and P.C. in any way, please exit the site! Don't read this and then bitch and moan later on about it. I can't stress enough, life's too short so get over yourself. Now... me and my fans cordially invite you to pucker up and kiss our collective asses!"

If you have to excuse your bad jokes with a disclaimer after you've made them, then they aren't funny and neither are you.