Yesterday, I stumbled across an article that was called something like "20 ways to tell your husband you're pregnant again."
I can't actually locate it again, so I can't actually link to it, but if you are curious, I'm sure google will help you with finding similar. They were ideas like, "Put your kid in a set of pyjamas that say something about it and have him put the kid to bed."
During my search for that stupid article, I found a pinterest page of ways to announce it to the world including SEVERAL pictures of a presumably first born holding a sign that said,
"Only child expiring August 2014".
Um. Condolences? Is this really a nice way to tell them?
Do you want to know what I did, when I found out I was pregnant again?
I took the test, walked out of the bathroom, lay flat out on the bed and stared at the ceiling. Ryan walked in, I gave him a withering look and said, "Look." and showed him the test.
It never occurred to me to surprise him.
This baby was not entirely unplanned but I also would have been perfectly comfortable to not have another one. I was actually ambivalent about going through the whole thing a second time. Ryan wasn't. So, half of me plus a whole Ryan outvoted (I guess?) the other half of me. That half was freaking out a little bit on the bed that day. That same part that spends an inordinate amount of time trying to understand other people's motivations instead of just ignoring them.
"But WHY do they want to go to the mall?"
"But WHY do they go to the toilet together?"
"But WHY are they eating that terrible food?"
"But WHY is he buying Kraft Lite Singles (TM) and stool softener?"
Oh wait, I know the answer to that last one.
I also told Elinor right away, which surprised some people. How horrible to have parents who would keep something like that from you. Even if I had a miscarriage, even if it was devastating (it wouldn't have been), in fact _especially_ if it was devastating, why would you not tell your child? It just seems like exactly the kind of thing parents are for: teaching your kid about the world.